Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Puffins Peanut Butter Cereal

So I decided to mix it up a little bit with this post. See the image is on the right this time. Crazy I know!

I've always been a little wary of the cereal with the rain forest animals on the front of it at Trader Joe's. I'm totally for the rain forest and I buy the over priced rain forest crunch candy at the rain forest cafe and make sure to eat the rain forest Ben and Jerry's peace pop thingies. But the rain forest animals on my cereal box was pushing it. I really love cereal and I didn't want to end up with some granola crunchy rocks and twigs swimming in milk full of fiber but tasting like crap. Paul would have killed me if I brought that home.

Luckily Puffins cereal is so delicious that you don't even really remember that it has something to do with endangered animals. Actually I have to throw this out there I have no flippin' clue what a Puffin is. But I'm sure the back of the box will tell me! (cut to the scene of me reading the back of the box and trying to figure out what the heck a puffin is)

Well that was disappointing. There's some information on the number of species of puffins, but I swear, the box is acting like I'm some puffin expert. (aside: seriously I don't think I've had this much fun in a while, you should really try typing the word puffin over and over and over again and see if you don't laugh out loud). The box is telling me to Adopt A Puffin, but I'm not really sure why, are they endangered? They kind of look like do-do birds, maybe puffins are toast because they look too much like other species that went extinct? The box invites me to buy some puffin stuff (a beanie puffin no thanks and a puffin canvas tote bag, an idea they clearly stole from TJs) and also sends me to a website about "these unique costal birds" on www.projectpuffin.org.

Yeah, uh, these birds aren't actually endangered, project puffin just refers to the fact that they no longer live in Maine and they are trying to bring them back. Are you kidding me? But I do like the website because it answers 26 questions that I might have about puffins, including where they got their name: Puffin originally meant "fatling." The name was used to describe the chubby chicks of the Manx Shearwater, with which puffin chicks were confused.

Well even if the plight of the puffin was a little disappointing, the cereal really is the best thing ever. It's got a delicious crunchy peanut buttery taste, it tastes delicious with milk and it doesn't go soggy in milk at all (but maybe that's because I eat it so quickly because it's so yummy!) There are so many things going for this cereal taste wise. And because it is TJs, it's relatively healthy, which means:
  • 100% Natural (whatever that means)
  • Low Fat (okay but seriuosly most cereals are low fat... that's like putting low fat on Hershey's chocolate syrup, what do they think we are stupid? yeah I guess we are stupid)
  • Wheat Free (this one took me a while, I marveled at how something so delicious could be wheat free because that sounds so wonderful, but really it just means that the puffin cereal is made of corn and they just don't want to advertise that it's really corn deliciousness)
  • No Hydrogenated Oils or Trans Fats (those are the newest enemies so thanks Puffin Cereal!)
  • Dairy Free (well okay but I'm going to add tons of dairy because it's cereal, do the Puffin people really not understand that part of eating cereal?)
  • Vegetarian (ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What, cereal comes with bits of meat nowadays?)
  • No Cholesterol (thanks Puffin Cereal!)
  • No Artifical Flavors, Colors or Preservatives (I kind of doubt this one, since it tastes so yummy it can't possibly be free of preservatives)
  • Kosher (Oy that's good I guess)
Long Live The Puffins!

Cost: $3.29

Nutrition Facts:
Serving Size: 3/4 Cup and 1/2 Cup Skim Milk
Calories: 150
Total Fat: 2g
Dietary Fiber: 2g (this is the important thing to check out on cereal... 2g is pretty standard for cereals that aren't that good for you like Lucky Charms)
Sugars: 6g (this is also another important thing, especially if you like the sugar cereals like I do, Lucky Charms actually has 13g of sugar per serving, so I guess Puffin Cereal is marginally better than Lucky Charms)

On the back:
A whole bunch of information about puffins, but here's the hard sell on the Puffins Cereal (in case you are wondering Barabara is the name of the bakery that puts out the puffin cereal, visit her online at www.barbarasbakery.com):

Energize your day the healthy way with the nutritious crunchy corn taste of Peanut Butter Puffins. Lightly sweetened with real peanut butter and made from only natural ingredients, Peanut Butter Puffins make a delicious breakfast fun. All Barbara's products are made without artificial flavors, colors, preservatives or refined white sugar and Barbara's never uses hydrogenated oils, which may increase the risk o fheart disease. Enjoy Puffins as a low fat snack right out of the box or as a tasty topping for yogurt or ice cream. Try all four varieties - Original, Cinnamon, Peanut Butter and Honey Rice.

Store location: by all the scary natural granola, rain forest cereal types.

6 comments:

Kartik said...

Ok, but how could you leave out the Puffin Pajamas? Not only do they look completely absurd, they provide alliteration which, much like Puffins Peanut Butter Cereal, makes a delicious breakfast fun.

But don't you think some fun is implied in the deliciousness of the breakfast? I mean, have you really ever had a delcious breakfast that was un-fun?

But back to the cereal. What I really need to know before I go out and purchase my own box of Bab's Puffins Peanut Butter Cereal is, does the milk get all peanut buttery by the end? Because that would really gross me out. It already mildly concerns me that they have basically made corn taste like peanut butter, and then manufactured it on machinery blessed by a rabbi.

BTW, did you even notice that this is you first product review (other than that book that they don't even sell at TJ's) that is not TJ's brand? But how do they decide when to make things generic TJ's brand and when not? And why don't they come up with some catchy name the way Safeway has Safeway Select or Ralphs with their Private Selection? Perhaps TJ's Selectable Joes (TM), since it seems that "select" is a requirement for all generic grocery brands.

I really hate Rain Forest Cafe a lot because they totally raped me twice in a row and the wait is always forever for very mediocre food. And I have heard that they barely give any money to the rain forest anyway.

But, I do truly have to commend you for bringing back the rain forest in your final line. It's like the way stand up comedians end, by bringing it back around to a joke they told earlier in their act. Your talents are virtually limitless.

ilana said...

Kartik: to answer your burning question, no, the milk doesn't turn peanut buttery. Pretty magical, ain't it? I mean for some cereals chocolate milk (coco puffs) or blue milk (lucky charms) is endearing but I have to agree that peanut butter flavored milk doesn't sound too good.

I think maybe the rabbi blessing made it so.

Yes funnily enough I was going to mention that this was my first post on a non-TJs product, but then I thought about how nobody would really care about that. Lesson learned.

Speaking of the TJs private label brand, one of my favorite things is how TJs turns all ethnic on ethnic foods, like Trader Giotti's when they sell TJs pasta and Trader Ming's when they sell chinese food. I'm seriously not making this up. I don't really know why it isn't Trader Jose's for all the fantastic hispanic food that they sell, maybe they realize that's just going to far? But as soon as I have a Trader [insert vaguely offensive ethnic version of Joe here] food I will definitely include this in the title.

Have you heard about Albertson's Essensia private label brand? Terrible name, it kind of sounds like a laxative to me.

In case you were wondering, milk is the top selling private label item for grocery stores.

And really, I actually kind of hate the rain forest cafe, the food isn't all that great and it always kind of smells weird.

Aaron said...

I totally laughed out loud just now! It escalated from a chuckle, to a laugh, then a laugh that carried throughout the house. I love your comments on the "dairy free" and "vegetarian" aspects of the Puffin cereal.

Anonymous said...

I found your blog in a Google search for "Puffins cereal" and laughed out loud reading it. :D I bought the Original today and love it - crunchy, tasty, healthy!

Anonymous said...

I just discovered Puffins yesterday and am so in love with it! Just found your blog on google...fun stuff.

TraderGrubber said...

This cereal is delicious! If you mix this with your favorite chocolate cereal, it becomes a bowl of chocolate peanut butter heaven. Breakfast of champions!